These Two....

Awwww, found these two passed out in the family room... 

So precious....

Of course Diamond is snoring.....LOL

~ 2 0 1 6 ~

New Chapter

New Beginning

5....4...3...2...1  

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!

Welcoming 2016 ~

We are ready to welcome the Year 2016.

* Food is ready ✅

* Hot chocolate bar is replenished for the last time ✅

* 12 kinds of fruits are present ✅

* Rice bin is filled ✅

* Salt dish container is filled✅

* House is cleaned✅

* Coins in everyone's pocket✅

* Wearing polka dot clothes ✅

* All lights are on ✅

* Ready to play board games until the midnight strike ✅

My First Gift from God ~

My Monica Isabella, my first born, my only princess turns 20 years old today. I look at her and I can’t believe how much she has changed.  The baby girl that took my breath away and stole my heart forever is independent, courageous, and determined in pursuing her dreams.  My love for her is immeasurable.  Every year I try to quantify it, in some way, but it always fall short because how can you express the true meaning of “to the moon and back” plus “infinity and beyond” with all that I am or will ever be? 

Last night, while she was at work, I sat in her room and looked through her baby pictures, christening and first communion gowns, art works, middle school plays memorabilias, talent show awards, cheerleading uniforms, soccer awards, football and basketball uniforms and gears, prom dresses, and high school adventures ~ hmmm….my heart ached.  Time truly went by so swiftly. Then repeatedly, I closed my eyes and inhaled deeply, I could still smell that perfect baby smell. And no matter how many times I looked around the room, her current photographs, her things ~ the remnants of her baby face was still the only thing I saw….. 

To my Kweng-Kweng, 

You came into my world and have been my happiness and strength ever since. On this 20th anniversary of your birth, I wish you a lifetime of love, the same wholehearted, all in love you give to others. To this day, your smiles still soothe me, your tears tear me down and your sadness destroys me.  Your laughter is contagious and infectious. I love the way you go after everything in life with such flare and optimism. I hope that you always allow your wonderful self to shine. Remember; do not let others tell you how or who to be. Do not let others let you waiver from your own path that God has carefully designed for you.  Above all, do not let anyone make you feel anything other than amazing. You are intelligent, sincere, caring, generous, funny, creative, and oh so kind.  Know that you have been blessed with everything you need in life to succeed and to find happiness. This world is an amazing, yet a challenging place. It is yours to savor, navigate, learn, and enjoy. Always live each day with a sense of gratitude and God will honor your heart.

I love that you stick up for what you believe in and for the underdog.  I love your stubbornness and your follow through.  I love that your heart compels you to get involved when you see a homeless person, sick person or a sad child.  I love you for being exactly who you are and I would never change a thing about you.  You are perfect in every way.

You have shadowed me. You have mimicked me. You have, and still do, sit on my lap and played with my hair. You have dressed me up. You have made me sit down and snuggle with you, watching and crying over love stories and drama movies. You have always wanted to know, in maddening detail, what I thought about everything. But, mostly, you have watched. And you have seen me as no one has seen me. You read my face and my body as if it were a map to your future. And you listen. You hear every self-directed negative muttering, every frustrated sigh. You’ve noticed my tired voice, happy voice, sad voice, and angry voice. Whenever you noticed I was crying, even though I made no noise, from the other room, simply by the sound of my breathing, you knew and you were there to comfort me with your warmest hugs and silence.  For all those times, thank you for simply being my strength and direction.  

Now, as you continue to venture into your new world with independence, always remember that I am here, for today and always, to hold your hand, to wipe away your tears and yes, to kick anyone’s behind if need be.  Even though you drive me crazy with your sense of independence, particularly when it’s in direct opposition to mine ~ inside, I am so proud of you for standing your ground.

May you continue to be completely and totally you. May you know how deeply and truly you are loved...by me, by your family, and most of all, by God.  May you dream big dreams, and have the courage to follow them.

So today, I celebrate you and all that you have become.  But most especially, I celebrate the day that I met one of the most amazing person I have ever known, YOU.  I wish you a lifetime of love and acceptance of yourself, I want you to see and love yourself the way I see you; perfect, just the way you are.

Happiest 20th Birthday my sweet Kweng-Kweng, my forever baby girl, my precious gift from God. 

I love you deeply ❤
Mom

Key Ingredients ~

Three of the key ingredients to our happiness are FAITH, FAMILY, and FOOD. Ergo, this Christmas Day, with everyone present, we are sitting down together, chatting endlessly about everything, and enjoying our Christmas dinner while thanking God for ALL the blessings He's provided for us, especially for our families, relatives, and friends across the globe and for our Brothers and Sisters In Arms who are faithfully and unceasingly serving our great nation and protecting our freedom. 

From all of us, MERRY CHRISTMAS

Merry Christmas ~

During this time of faith and family, 

may the true meaning of Christmas

 fill you with joy, love, hope, 

and forgiveness. 

From our family to yours, 

we wish you a Merry Christmas.

Fountain of Youth

Fountain Of Youth

Aging. We are all going to do it no matter who we are, where we live, or what we believe. Yet I have found there is much intense fear and shame around the most human thing we can possibly do. What exactly is “getting older”? Chronologically and physical changes, are objective markers. Yet I have noticed the biggest mental distinction between someone who is “old” or “young” has to do with how they measure the present against the past. They start their sentences with, “it used to be like…” or “in my day….” More often than not, the present can’t hold a candle to a romanticized illusion of the past, and the statement takes on a woeful frustrated tone. People of any numerical age can do this, and anyone can choose not to.

Well, I choose not to ~ for I believe in the freedom of embracing change and focusing on the NOW. I am very aware of the past, of people I have known, choices I have made, and how decisions and experiences have led me to where I am today. But I don’t use those events as a ruler against the now. The past is helpful to me only if it offers perspectives and insights of how I can enjoy in the present. By fully comprehending that there is no one moment better than another. I am free to live my forty-six year old life with novelty, interest, and investigative curiosity. Nevertheless, I find aging in a clearer context rather than summing it up with a number ~  

I am aware of all the physical changes happening in my body, not to mention my endurance level, capacity, and reactions to all environmental factors. I remember this quote from Samuel Ullman when I celebrated my 40th birthday, “Nobody grows by living a number of years. We grow old by deserting our ideals. Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul.” Nowadays, I find humor in naming few of my wrinkles around my eyes; they are Innie, Minnie, and Moe, etc... And probably in the next few years, they will multiply and dominate not only my face, but my neck, chest, etc. And no matter how much face cream or moisturizers I use, my own wrinkle population will breed exponentially.

No doubt, I have aches and pains too, not only from the overall physical demands and injuries from my years of service in the military, but also from the day to day regenerating physical activities related to my normal living. But I know that’s part of aging. I also remember somewhere hearing that if all the people in a room could lay their aches and pains or problems out on the table and then choose among those laying there, most folks would pick up the ones they laid down. Chances are they’ve learned how to live with the problems they have, and wouldn't want to have to learn to live with new ones. Remember the adage; the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence? If you cross over to the other side and look back, the grass is greener on the side you came from.

I remember writing about change and  mentioning the phrase “Age is only a number” few years ago when I turned 40. I’ve received numerous comments on some of my pictures about having a secret of staying young. Well, there is no secret at all.  I just learned that the trick of being “young” at any chronological age is to embrace and accept changes, and conversely, to be surrounded by the people who loves me.  Moreover,  in every acceptance, I found gratitude for the ability to live without having to resist them. I just turned 46 last week (Aug 14 to be exact),  and these past few days, hours, and minutes, life has shown me that I will continue to have a much easier and happier time if I dance with impending changes once again instead of trying to step on its toes. 

So as I begin another chapter in my life, changes are coming at me on a more direct line of fire. Am I dodging them or putting on a protective gear to avoid them? No. I am not doing that, rather I am accepting them wholeheartedly. Change itself gives us the opportunity to age not only gracefully, but happily. In every decisions, we are presented with the chance to become more confident, more at peace with ourselves, to be happy, and to feel blessed and content. I also realized that change itself is “not bad” and it is “not wrong.” Am I worried about the criticisms of others and concern for the need of approval from everyone? No! I am strong enough and wise enough to understand that my choices are my decisions. They don’t know my whole story and my plight. They don’t know my pains, struggles, and discontent, therefore, they don't have the right to judge me. My story and my past belong to me! It goes along with my mantra for this year, which is  "I NO LONGER" by Meryl Streep...(posted in my blog).  I only have the time and patience for those who truly respect me, understand me, and love me unconditionally.  

And on my birthday, as I looked at my birthday cake, surrounded by my Lovey, children (that includes my dogs Chanel and Diamond), listening to the Birthday song, and slowly closing my eyes, I did not make any wish or wishes this year…. I simply prayed:

“Heavenly Father, a year has passed and as I do every day, I commit my life to You, under Your Kingship and wing. Guide, forgive and empower me this year to make it a victorious fulfilling and awesome year, all to Your glory! Thank you for my life ordained and set out by You! Thank you for choosing me – to come to the earth and be an instrument. Thank you for the GRACE, SALVATION, MERCY, LOVE and all the other many things you bless me with everyday. I realize that health, strength, sanity, ability, relationships, experiences and trials are there to bless me and keep me close to you. Thank you for the privilege to Praise and Worship You! I love you!”

Goodbye 45 - H E L L O  46

Happy Birthday to me!

Favorite Escape

Bookstore, my favorite escape has a thousand books. 

The colors, hues, and touch of every cover suddenly turns into a door with magic hinges. ❤ 

— at Barnes & Noble Booksellers.

The Beach

  

God is truly amazing....

HE created this beautiful masterpiece called THE BEACH ❤ 

— at The Beach on Beautiful Hilton Head Island.

Goodbye January

Please be sweet....

Sister Love

Big Sister Diamond showing a lot of love to Baby Sister Chanel.

8 May 2012 ~ Chanel's First Day Home

Introducing "Chanel"

INTRODUCING 

my new puppy

"Chanel"

Born: 18 March 2012

Breed:  Shih Tzu

Dogs have given us their absolute all.  We are the center of their universe.  We are the focus of their love and faith and trust. 

Love....

For every L O V E

For every beauty, there is an eye somewhere to see

For every truth, there is an ear somewhere to hear

For every LOVE, there is a heart somewhere to receive it.

~ Ivan Panin

Love Conquers All

Love is the voice under all silences

The hope which has no opposite in fear

The strength so strong mere force is feebleness

The truth more fierce than the sun

More lasting than a star

~ E. E. Cummings

Missing L O V E

L O V E is life

And if you miss L O V E,

You miss life.

~ Leo Buscaglia

Beginning of L O V E

Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.

~ Mother Teresa

Love is Invisible

Love is a force more formidable than any other.

It is invisible - it cannot be seen or measured,

yet it is powerful enough to transform you in a moment,

and offer you more joy than any material possession could.

~ Barbara de Angelis

Whisper of the Heart

For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.

~ Judy Garland

I'll Take Off My Mask

I'll Take Off My Mask

by Ella M.

Will you still love me even if I’m not perfect?

Will you still love me even if I’m not the kind of person you wished I were?

Will you still look into my eyes with warmth even if you saw my mask and my shadows?

Will you still hold my hand even if you knew there would be times I’d let you down?

For though I yearn to take care of you as I should,

though I desire to love you with a love that never falters and fades,

my knees tremble this very moment thinking the day we would meet again

and that you will hold me in your arms.

Shall I kiss you?

Shall I hold your hand and bask in the light of your spirit

knowing that you know my past and my darkness,

knowing there will be times that the light of my love will sometimes be overshadowed

by the mask and darkness that is in me?

Sometimes I’d be silent and I might bore you.

I may not laugh at your jokes, and you may not understand the spell that’s enshrouding me.

Sometimes I’d get troubled and I’d fail to put into words

what the hell it is that troubles me.

I wouldn’t be good company then, and I couldn’t make you smile.

Sometimes I’d get moody and I might not enjoy the things you’d like us to do together.

Sometimes I’d lose my temper

and I’d no longer act like the fine person who can stand next to you.

Sometimes I’d get jealous and I might say things I don’t really mean.

Sometimes I’d talk too much that I might drive you away.

Sometimes I’d get touchy and I’d get easily hurt.

And no matter how mature I try to be, at times I’d act in childish ways.

Instead of pouring my heart to you, I’d get back to being SILENT

and don’t say things to help you understand.

Sometimes I’d say things I shouldn’t say.

And no matter how much I desire to protect you and make you happy,

sometimes I’d be the one who’d cause you the most pain.

But if you will love me, I will take off my mask.

I will bare my whole self-naked before you,

and I will reveal to you my soul.

If you will love me, you can be certain that it is I that you will love,

not a mask that fools you and gives you only what your eyes desire to see.

If you will love me,

you can be certain that you will see beyond my eyes the love you deserve.

If you will love me,

you can be sure that you will love the depths of me, all of me that is in me,

and I in turn will love you with all of me,

with all my soul, with all my mind,

with all my spirit,

with all my flaws and beauty,

and with all my very heart.

all i know is that…i found you, you found me, and i love you for everything that you are.